Tuesday, 1 April 2008

New members of Standing Committee announced!

Speaking at a press conference this morning, Archbishop Jensen proudly announced the appointment to the Sydney Diocesan Standing Committee of four new members.

"Every one of the new appointees has in his previous role displayed years of unquestioning allegiance to a rigidly enforced corporate profile" the Archbishop explained, "and can be trusted to vote exactly as instructed, irrespective of the issue. They're completely incapable of independent thought, and collectively represent exactly the kind of men we need to run this diocese on our behalf."


When questioned about the absence of Birdie the Early Bird, Archbishop Jensen insisted he is committed to providing biblical ministry opportunities for women, but "God has clearly established different roles and paths for each of the sexes. That there just happens to be more opportunities for men, and that men's roles are better paid and don't involve cleaning is simply one of the miracles of His Word."

8 comments:

Anonymous said...

They were also on the Anglican church league's how to vote card, otherwise they would never have been elected.

susan s. said...

Great! What an attractive Standing Committee.

Birdy the Early Bird will just have to settle for a Christian Education gig!

Doorman-Priest said...

You are a very bad man! Long may you reign.

Lapinbizarre said...

You say "appointed". Is the Sydney Standing committee appointed rather than elected?

Kate Morningstar said...

I was just gonna say what D-P did.

BooCat said...

Oh, Alcibades, you are such as bad, bad boy. I can hardly wait to find out what you will come up with next. Do keep it up!

thepoetryman said...

He says that His word
is full of miracles
which I find to be absurd
I'd say he's full of...

Drat! Now what rhymes with miracles?

Alcibiades said...

Sydney Standing Committee comprises 55 men and 5 women, of which 42 are elected by Synod (the other 18 being the bishops, archdeacons and administrative officers) acting both as a whole, and on a regional basis. As the anonymous comment at the top hints, these "elected" positions usually result from being listed on the Anglican Church League's "How-to-Vote" card and are not normally contested. Somewhere (I'll try harder to find it if anyone's keen) I've got a study which suggests only 30% of positions are put to the vote (I'd actually thought it was fewer), and running against an ACL nominee is a fast track to ending your clerical career - or at least ensuring you won't be moving anywhere further in Sydney. (Listen carefully and you'll hear the trolls frothing at the mouth over that comment - & yet they'll be hard put naming more than 4 members of the current committee who aren't members, and I can name six whose ministries went no further in Sydney after daring to stand up to the ACL ticket.)

The ACL are themselves a fascinating organisation - a kind of Freemasonry for Sydney evangelicals (you used to have to wait to be asked before you could join - they didn't ever recruit, and many laity are unaware of their existence) without the robes and secret handshakes. Nor a fine brandy after the meeting.

Before posting the above I checked it over with a friend who's attended many synods, but vowed to never do so again ("they started making me feel suicidal"). He laughed and pointed out that normally the only members who say they were "elected" (as opposed to "appointed") are those who were elected unopposed.