Wednesday 27 February 2008

Go ahead trolls, make his day...


BlackStar would like to tell the brave anonymous troll who's been threatening to pay us a visit that he's looking forward to getting acquainted.

I've explained to him that this is unlikely, since the troll's IP address shows he's not even in Australia (nobody is ever truly anonymous on the web - not even Matthian trolls claiming to know me); but having chased and bitten intruders twice before, BlackStar's developed a taste for attackers. Literally.

Friends, on the other hand are always welcome; he's really a very friendly dog if he likes you. People who wish to express opinions different to his are also fine with him, but please don't start raising your voice - BlackStar hates people shouting at his family and friends. Just don't push your luck if you think the Duck Noodle Gang can be scared into silence. We thought about the consequences before starting this blog.

Which is more than trolls ever do before clicking "send".

9 comments:

Doorman-Priest said...

Bring on the albino attack monks.

Wormwood's Doxy said...

Dear God, Alcibiades---is someone actually THREATENING you?!?!?

To that troll---if you are such a brave warrior for God, why not sign your name to your threats? After all, if you are doing "God's" work in the world, shouldn't you have the courage of your convictions? (Of course, you have to ignore all that stuff that Jesus says about loving your enemies, turning the other cheek, etc., but hey...don't let the words of Christ get in the way of your little hate-on.)

And really---just what harm do you think that Alcibiades is doing? Do you really think God is threatened by his speaking his truth about the church in Sydney? If so, I pity you, because your God is a weak and puny local deity--not the Creator of the Universe.

You must be awfully afraid that Alcibiades is right if you are resorting to physical threats--because if you just thought he was wrong, you'd ignore him...

Brian R said...

Well said, Doxy. The troll tried his evil on my blog to turn me against Alcibiades but long years of teaching adolescents mean I ignore such puerile rubbish.

Alcibiades said...

DP: LOL! Although we're more probably talking about Gollum than Silas the Monk. Except Sydney Diocese is more like Efrafa from Watership Down than it is Middle Earth.

Doxy: Sorry if I gave the impression that this nutter is in any way sanctioned by the heirarchy here: in any case their style if pushed to deal with troublemakers like me is to have lawyers fire the first volley. Or orchestrate a "trial by media", but that's become rarer as their own credibility has diminished.

The sad fact is that aggressive and intolerant religion appeals to agggressive and intolerant people, and if they're your core market it's inevitable that the wingnuts you attract around the fringes are going to be flakey. The problem is that those who should know better never do anything to help settle them down, but rather just fan the flames of the fellow's intolerance (it's invariably a young male)until he's burnt out.

Noble Wolf: I think the troll that pushed me over the edge and into words on this topic is a different one to that which hit the comment pages of our blogs a few weeks back: this hero has a different IP address and internet provider to the one leaving snide remarks on the back of month-old posts, and although he's logging on from somewhere quite close to the really nasty nutter, there's enough distance between the servers to suggest different people, even though I haven't seen them viewing simultaneously.
There's also a new lurker using a university server who seems to have initially dropped by as a result of an email from the original troll, so it'll be interesting to see if he starts up as well.

Or - and I'm praying here - he and his friends just might hang around and start thinking that Christ really could be big enough to forgive, redeem, and live though people who don't see the world in black and white. And that if they stopped and took Jesus' love seriously God wouldn't be calling ratbags like me to start speaking out ;-)

Lapinbizarre said...

What type of dog is BlackStar? Difficult to tell from the photograph.

Do you know for sure that your troll is a down-under garden variety? Modus operandi suggests US Southern "Reasserter" strain, in which case almost certainly too indolent and probably obese - chronic alcohol impairment not out of the question either - to make good on any threats.

And you-all with a new child. Good Christian stuff.

Alcibiades said...

Hi LP!: BlackStar has an uncertain pedigree: it's just as difficult to figure out what he his in real life!. After meeting a couple who knew the parentage of their near identical dog our closest guess is Dachshund(not minature)/Labrador; , but the other best suggestion came from Channel 10 Sydney's weatherman who is sort of a local Willard Scott, and a truly good bloke - I've met him in an entirely unrelated context where he was in no way "on air" and simply being himself, and was blown away by his warmth, humility and courtesy. As part of a promotion for Monica's doggie Rescue of which BlackStar is an alumni, Tim described him as "part platypus", which is as good a guess as any.

Once a week or so we go walking in Centenial Park, which is a very upmarket part of town, and meet lots of "designer breeds" and their humans, to whom I (if Mrs. Caliban isn't listening) descibe him as a "Nova Scotian Seal Dog" - a fiction of my own imagination. Believe it or not I've even had people respond by speaking knowingly of the breed!

Whatever his ancestry, he's about knee high, with short legs and an oversized head with a huge mouth, he topped the class qwhen we went to obedience school, but then spoiled everythimg by attacking the dog who came second during the graduation ceremony. While a pup somebody broke his jaw and two ribs (before we got him), and he hates men in boots and road-safety vests. And we love him dearly - but that's probably obvious.

Most of my trolls are in England (around London & the south): I haven't had any U.S. IPs yet. That's probably because Sydney has been pushing pretty hard to get into evangelical dioceses in the UK, and rather than risk letting the really hard-case nutters loose locally they've been pushing them off to Britain in a do-or-die "softening up" exercise. At the same time the really extremist Brits (known by people like MadPriest as"enthusiasts" - which is probably the most damning insult an English person can use) come over here to train, then going home twice as full of bile as when they arrived.

The lie these "emissaries of love" push is that their brand of gnosticism is overwhelmingly succesful, loved, and accepted here - which is complete crap on all counts: they're actually losing ground at about the same rate as everyone else is in the Anglican communion. Consequently people countering the official fiction, like me, pose a genuine threat to their quest for power.

In many ways I wish they were your southern stereotypes: at least they have a tradition of valuing free speach & hospitality to which I could appeal (although I'm not sure they're ok with extending that to ethnic and sexual minorities). But then again, our wingnuts (generally) can't buy guns ;-)

Lapinbizarre said...

BlackStar's head misled me. Facially he looks very like a pointer I got three years ago from a local pet rescue group. She, having been abused by two consecutive hunter owners who tried, manfully but most unsuccessfully, to "hunt" her - bird slaughter being big down here in South Carolina - is now aggressive only in the desire to put on a full Busby Berkeley dance routine for every new human being she greets. My middle dog, half chow and also a "rescue" beast, was aggressively defensive in the company of all black males (never females) when I first had her, which seems a reliable indicator of the source of the abuse she had suffered. She still, at ten years, takes to the hills if she sees me holding anything that resembles a stick or cane.

Trying not to think about "reassessors" this morning. Bye.

Lapinbizarre said...

Ps. Re Southern stereotypes, if you think they value free speech, check the correspondence column of any average Southern daily. The hospitality thing is a tad over-rated as well.

Fran said...

I have a good ip blocker if you need it - just email me at festinalente07 at gmail dot com!

Blasted trolls!

Gorgeous dog - and of an uncertain pedigree, is there any better kind? I think I may start to describe myself that way!!